Monday, August 20, 2012

Check Yo-self

I really tried hard yesterday not to go to church.  I was tired.  My head hurt.  Stupid allergies were flaired up.  The boys needed a bath and Pat (master child bather) wasn't home.  But, I made myself get up and get ready and off to church the boys and I went. 

I love my Sunday school class.  Love them.  Feels like a really dysfunctional family dinner, in the best way.  We always have tons of laughs, and even though we rarely make it through our whole lesson, we still learn something every week.  I love knowing that I am not alone in my trials-whether it being a parent or a spouse.  Sitting there amidst all the laughter and Christian fellowship yesterday, something was said that smacked me right upside the head.  We were talking about why we didn't always talk to God about things in our life.  I chimed in that I figured God was tired of hearing it.  Same old story, different day.  Some situations in my life have remained a source of frustration and I've quit talking to God about them because I just assumed He was tired of hearing.  I'm tired of talking about it, so how could He not be tired of hearing it??  Then one of my classmates likened our relationship with God to the one we have with our children.  Do we ever tire of listening to their concerns, fears, worries, ect?  Nope.  Whoopsie.  Maybe things weren't changing in my life because I had quit talking to God about them.  How could He give me peace, compassion and hope if I wasn't bringing my problems to Him?  Point taken, God. 

After class, I headed upstairs thankful and already feeling some of  the weight that has been on my shoulders lifting.  Thinking to myself how glad I was I came to church this morning and how I really needed to hear my lesson today. And now I was ready to worship.  Welp, God wasn't done with me yet.  And I'll be daggoned if Pastor Mike didn't preach a message right in my ear.  The title of his sermon was, "Getting it Right When You've Done it All Wrong."  Sounded harmless enough.  Nope.  Smacks me right in the face.  Sometimes it just takes hearing something out loud for you to remember how true it is.  Even something as small as acknowledging what sin is.  Sin is knowing what we should (or shouldn't) do and doing it (or not doing it.)  Hello, Pastor Mike.  Glad you decided to just talk to me today.  =)  He went on to talk about three points and they all were things I knew, but really needed to hear. 

     1.  Face the facts.  Stop trying to place blame or make excuses.  Acknowledge your sin and pour out your heart to God.  We are going to be wrong, we just need to be ready to fess up.
     2.  Ask God to change you from the inside out.  For me, this meant quit asking God to change the other person, I want the change to come from me.  Pastor Mike said you can fool people, but you can't fool God.  Yep.  I want to be made new.
     3.  Accept God's forgiveness.  Out of all three of his points, I think this one is the hardest to do.  I can imagine God's frustration as we keep beating ourselves up over things that HE has already forgiven us for!!  Jay got upset yesterday while we were getting ready for church and said, " I wish I had no parents and no little brother always telling me what to do!!"  I explained to him how teaching him what to do was mine and his daddy's job.  God had given him to us to raise and teach how to be a good boy.  I went on to tell him how he needed to think about the things he says and how they may hurt someone's feelings.  Long story short, he was distraught for hours thinking he had made me sad.  I kept telling him that I accepted his apology and it was fine.  Now I am picturing God saying, "I already forgave you yesterday, a month ago, a year ago!"  Another point taken, God. 

Didn't mean to go all preachy on my blog, but just felt so much lighter after yesterday that I wanted to share with someone what God will do if we let Him.  Have a great week!!